FROM THE MOMENT, we are born to the moment we die—we search for significance.
We know that we are valuable, and our quests pull us here and there.
We watch those looking at our social media posts, our followers—and how many likes we get.
When we fail at something, we feel lousy about ourselves. And when others approve of us, we get over it —sometimes, we feel like we measure up.
We look for people to define our self-worth—we put our identity in achievements: wealth, fame, looks, our children's success or our reputation?
However, none of these can give us significance.
The Narrative
SOLOMON had an exciting and telling story.
In his attempt to gain wisdom, he searched out all history to find answers to life's questions.
He looked at all that he had achieved and found that all was vanity. (Ecclesiastes 2:11)
He did everything his way and said all was like a vapour.
But why did he say so?
Money goes as it comes, and beauty fades. Joy and satisfaction do not originate and cannot be sustained by anything under the sun; these were his words. (Ecclesiastes 1:16; 2:26)
YOUR ATTEMPT to meet success and approval fall into these two things: compulsion and perfection.
When people's approval drive you, you are searching for significance.
When you seek perfection and avoid relationships that might fail, you fear rejection and become a slave to people's opinions.
The fact that you didn't go to college makes you feel dumb. You live in a particular zip code, so you think you're less than everyone else and can't amount to anything.
These are lies. God wants you to replace them with the truth.
YOU PRETEND and become an actor because you are seeking someone's approval.
Jacob sought for Isaac's approval and tricked his father to receive the birthright. (Genesis 27)
Over time, you do not know the real you anymore and live different lives in various seasons.
THE PROBLEM is that we confuse affirmation with love.
You need someone who will know the total you—your failures, successes and all; someone who will love you.
And the only person that can do that is God.
The bible says, "He that knew no sin became sin that we might become the righteousness of God in Christ Jesus." (2 Corinthians 5:21)
If you have not received Him as your Lord and Saviour, you need to do it now.
Jesus gave His life to purchase you. I know you may be struggling with doubts and values, but your self-worth will begin to change as you understand Christ.
Confess your sins to Him and ask Him to come into your heart.
If you just gave your life to Christ, you are now a believer. You are valuable, chosen and infinitely precious to God; that’s the affirmation you need.
The blood of Jesus is your worth.
BRINGING IT TOGETHER
IT WILL be a waste to attempt to change a behaviour without first knowing what drives it - Robert McGee.
I know that it is tough to break away from these erroneous beliefs, but you need to know that you can.
You must understand that your self-worth does not come from a performance or people's accolades.
It comes from God!